Transparency from the heart of a pastor

Is It Too Soon to Reload the U-Haul?

Tell us about your first day at something — school, work, as a parent, etc.

Sunday, October 5, 2003! It was my first Sunday at my first full-time music ministry. I was already far from excited to be there. The town was depressing, and I had already been told they hired me because they were desperate. Great start to a new ministry, right?!?

The service was interesting to say the least. It was Homecoming Sunday. For those who might not be familiar with this, it’s the day when a church celebrates its anniversary with a meal after the service. The service is often filled with extra music and may even have guests from the past involved. The auditorium was packed!

Two things happened in the service that stuck out to me that day. One involved a man in the church who had some mental challenges. As the ladies trio stepped up to sing, he loudly says, “We’re fixin’ to hear some pretty singin’.” The pastor, in his deep, raspy South Georgia accent says, “Shut up, Spanky! We don’t need a commentary.” All I could think was, “We are on TV and radio. Where is the dignity?”

The second thing that happened made me quite mad. The pastor never cared to warn me ahead of time that he demanded we sing every verse of every hymn. I led the opening hymn and left out a verse, which is a rather common thing in many churches. After we sang, the pastor stepped up to the pulpit and said, “Brother Matthew doesn’t know we sing EVERY VERSE of EVERY HYMN around here, so he’s gonna come back and sing the one he left out.” I was embarrassed! That was one of many public moments where he belittled his staff in front of the congregation, and I was all too ready to get the U-haul back, load it up, and move back to South Carolina. I got my wish, but it took 6 years to get it.

I’m glad my heart softened toward that church over time. Many of the people in that town weren’t quick to accept outsiders like me. I had to prove myself, which took about 6 months. When I left, I had many supporters, some who even reach out to me to this day.

Let’s just say that first Sunday was memorable. A lot has not come across in translation as I write, but I hope you were able to imagine the scenario to some degree. What’s your story? What first day sticks out in your mind?

2 responses to “Is It Too Soon to Reload the U-Haul?”

  1. Seems to me that someone who is as rigid and heavy handed as the senior pastor has no place in ministry at all.

    1. He was a great preacher, but he lacked the shepherding side. His staff rarely saw the softer side of him. His mentors prided themselves in how harsh they were to church employees. It definitely created a lot of problems through the years.

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